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The power of one

Lauren Miller //April 24, 2015//

The power of one

Lauren Miller //April 24, 2015//

How much of your mind space in your day is taken up playing the numbers game? How many likes do I have? How many people shared what I posted? How many people signed up for my seminar? How many people responded to my job post or team-building idea? Perhaps we have come to a conclusion that does not serve our inner peace and confidence: My work in this world has worth and value if it’s responded to in a specific way: numbers; positive feedback; conversion rates; ROI. Basically have my efforts paid off in a monetary and physical way?

Remember, stress is simply the power we give to outside circumstance to define our worth, value and what we believe we are capable of handling successfully. Let’s face it, we live in a society that judges success by numbers. which has led us to the unhealthy conclusion that unless we have something physical to show for the work that we do in this world — awards, degrees, titles, books sold, money earned, programs attended — then our work has little value.

I am well-versed in the numbers game and have found that this game has no winner. It’s like a spoiled child: The more you play it, the more it wants, of your mind space, time and attention and, all too often, to the detriment of our core values. There is always another player who has more of what you want in life which produces the serpents of envy, lust, selfish ambition and boasting, all of which are fueled by the fear that someone else will encroach on your territory and diminish your presence.

When you compare yourself with another person, it’s as if you are saying, “You have something (status, popularity, power) that I need in order to love and accept myself along with feeling successful and valued. Remember, an attachment is an emotional state of clinging due to the belief that without some person, thing or situation, I can’t be happy.”

What if we were to commit to the practice of fully occupying the space we have been entrusted with in this world, confident of the unique worth and value we bring to each situation? How would that shift how we show up in the projects we choose to pursue? I would imagine we would create more room for successful expansion and creativity. Nothing thrives in a state of fear, self-doubt and attachment.  

I will often use the following phrase to identify and adjust unhealthy self-perceptions around the numbers game: Does it fit in the pine box? Yes I am speaking about what you think I’m speaking about, the box we will lay in at the end of our journey on earth. This phrase comes out of my personal experience of facing my own death at 38 years old as I was diagnosed with advanced cancer. Nothing, from my perspective, clears your internal castle out of the non-essentials, which take up free rent, faster than a few near death experiences, of which I had two.

I have invited readers in previous articles into the practice of living life backwards, it’s not about what you do in this life, it’s about the person you commit to being behind what you do that leaves a lasting impression in this world. The next time you feel the tension within your body that accompanies your attachment to numbers and ROI ,consider the following reflection on the Power of One:

If but for one act of service; one kind remark; one moment of listening to understand rather than to be heard; one moment of considering the needs of another person over your own desire to be seen, acknowledged, recognized; one act of forgiveness; one moment of positive connection; one choice to stand for good; one person who chooses life in the face of adversity over death; one choice to speak the truth in love; one choice to listen to the inner voice of inspiration over the screams of the world; one act of kindness; word of encouragement; invitation to grow or prune for growth; one moment of silence and shared grief or rejoicing. What a difference we will make in the one day we have been blessed with; never underestimate the power of one life that is refreshed because of your one choice to show up with the intention to make the world a better place.

Join Lauren for her last complimentary workshop of the season: Saturday June 6th; 11-Noon; Park Meadows Pilates, Lone Tree. Topic: How to Guarantee Refreshment this Summer: Lighten Up, Let Go & Live. Limited Seating Please Call: 303-649-2164 to RSVP or visit: for more details and link to register.